


Area Gremlin wants to be held by Tol Boyfriend

by dinosaurrainbowstarfish (Charlie572)



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Body Image, Cuddling & Snuggling, DO NOT READ ON FANFICTION POCKET ARCHIVE LIBRARY, M/M, do not post on fanfiction pocket archive library
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-03
Updated: 2019-11-03
Packaged: 2021-01-21 02:17:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21291989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Charlie572/pseuds/dinosaurrainbowstarfish
Summary: This started out as me being frustrated with only the very beginning stages of fat body acceptance being shown in fic. I didn't want to write a "Martin hates his body until Jon makes him see how pretty he is" fic (as much as I love that trope)--in my experience while the "I hate everything about how I look, don't even touch me" stage of body acceptance happens a lot, the "I thought I was good with my body image until I realized I don't think of myself as having arms at all as a defense mechanism" stage is more real to my experience. Then this fic got completely away from me and I'm not sure I actually finished it.
Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims
Comments: 34
Kudos: 301





	Area Gremlin wants to be held by Tol Boyfriend

**Author's Note:**

> why do I only write smushy romance I hate romance and I just wrote this for the good cuddling

Martin doesn’t really think of himself as muscular. Sure, he rarely runs into a piece of furniture he can’t move, and he doesn’t mind hauling boxes of files all over the archives, but he’s always been heavy and while his self image isn’t negative, it is primarily based on the round shape of his body and not what he can do with it.

Jon thinks about Martin’s muscles all the time. It’s not his fault, really. The pulling full boxes of statements from high shelves with one hand was one thing, but Jon happens to know without a doubt that Martin could pick him up and he thinks about it all the time. 

It’s actually Basira’s fault. One day she had a backache that refused to go away no matter what exercises she did. Martin slipped his biceps under her shoulders and just picked her up, dangled her a few inches off the ground, and set her back down. 

Jon had to go lie down. For a long time. Martin hadn’t even been out of breath. He’d just gone back to making his tea. After picking up someone who easily had 40 pounds on Jon....

When Jon and Martin become whatever it is they’re calling it, Martin is completely blindsided by how cuddly Jon is. Some of Martin’s past flings have been cuddlers, but this is a whole new level for Martin. It starts off pretty standard fare--Jon’s hands on his hips, running up and down his sides while they hug. But when they’re lying down, Jon sometimes wraps his hands around Martin’s biceps, or puts a hand on Martin’s calf and just...squeezes for a moment before lying back down. Jon’s also the first partner Martin’s ever had hug him from behind. It’s not that Martin’s other partner’s weren’t attentive, it’s just that Martin is massively tall and most people can’t hug him from behind without bumping their chin into his shoulders. The top of Jon’s head doesn’t come up to Martin’s shoulders, but that doesn’t stop him from burying his face into the softness of Martin’s back and nuzzling. 

It takes Martin a while to piece together exactly why Jon seems to be scratching some itch deep in his soul. He settles on a couple of things, eventually. The first is that Jon is enamored with his body in its fullness--no one writes poetry about body rolls or back fat, but Jon appreciates those parts of Martin just as much as he appreciates Martin’s eyes or hands--the parts he’s learned to think of as “normal”. And, while Martin certainly cuddles back, Jon shows affection when he knows that Martin won’t be able to give that energy back--cuddling Martin’s whole body while he’s cooking and needs both of his hands, standing behind the couch when he’s watching TV and playing with his hair so that Martin can only awkwardly pat Jon’s hands. 

And maybe it’s because Martin’s just been ripped out of the grasp of the lonely, but being with Jon feels like having all the different pieces of Martin Blackwood put together into, maybe for the first time, a complete picture. 

Maybe love isn’t completing each other the way the pieces of a puzzle, maybe love is handing your lover all the pieces of you that you can’t fit together to see if they can see the big picture that’s supposed to be You. 

Or maybe Martin’s getting too lost in his head again, and love is the sound Jon makes when Martin picks him up and sets him on the counter so they can hug at the same height.

**Author's Note:**

> anybody got jonmartin or jon or martin hairwashing fics? hmu please


End file.
